There's no rhyme or reason to what I'm going to be sharing with you here over the next few paragraphs.  It's been a few days since I've visited with you, my rabid fan base (I can still call it a "base" even if it's only one person, right?  Even if that person is me?  Gotcha!), and anyway, I just wanted to share a few articles that I've found, or that have been sent to me. 

First up is the Fenway Hawk.  It's a front page news story over on the Boston Globe website, so most of you are probably aware, but the Hawks who call Fenway home during the off-season are sick and tired of you meddling humans.  In the second attack in two days, Mr. Razor-claws attempted to gouge the eyeballs out of a 13-year old girl.  Luckily he missed, although he did gash open her scalp, causing her to go to the hospital.

"The girl is fine," said Red Sox spokeswoman Susan Goodenow, who said the team followed up with the girl’s group from Memorial Boulevard Middle School in Bristol, Conn.

Following the incident, the Hawks (and their nest) have been evicted from Fenway.  And, incase you were wondering, no Hawks were harmed during the eviction, just a 13-year old girl... so I'm sure all you PETA people are relieved.  

You can check out a photo gallery on Boston.com here.

Second in the lineup, we have an Office-related article sent over to me from the CEO.   I figured since everybody's favorite mockumentary is finally airing new shows tonight, I'd share this potentially exciting news with you:  NBC has "greenlit" (greenlighted?) an Office Spinoff to being airing after next year's Super Bowl.

My first reaction was excitement.  I can't get enough of the Office.  My second reaction was impatience.  I don't want to wait 11 months for this!  The third, and last, reaction was trepidation.   I'm assuming we're going to be getting a show taking place in another Dunder-Mifflin branch, or perhaps one of their competitors.  And I'm also assuming we're going to be losing at least one character to be the main character on the new show.  Taking a quick glance around the Office, there are really only 2 characters who could carry this load:  Dwight and Jim.  I love Jim, but he only works in short, sophomoric spurts or in a Pam-centric storyline.  Dwight is the most likely candidate to get his own show, but honestly, I think we get the exact right amount of Dwight exposure in the current version of the Office.  I could see him getting his own "Office", but I could also see it growing tiresome very quickly.  I trust the makers of the show, so I hope they know what they're doing.  I also know that NBC is a failing station, and they'd most likely break up the perfect nucleus of the Office for a chance of some higher ratings.... so, we'll keep you updated as more of the story develops.  And if anyone out there knows more then me, please email us and fill up my glaring holes of ignorance.

UPDATE:  There's no new Office episode this week... it's next week.  Boy, am I an uninformed ass, or what?

Third on the list is the "Beat The Streak" semi-fantasy game over on MLB.com.  This is a heavily advertised game, so I won't dwell on it too long.  Basically, each day of the season you choose one Major League Batter who you think will get at least one hit that day.  The goal is to guess correctly every day until you surpass Joe DiMaggio's record hitting streak of 56 games.  The prize for beating the streak is 1 million dollars.  It's a fun game, but it's pretty difficult.  So far this year both Jose Reyes and Magglio Ordonez killed my streaks... so, go check it out, sign up, and who knows... you could win yourself a bunch of cash. 

Last in the rundown is the T-Shirt Gate.  Hopefully you're all aware of the shenanigans that went down a few nights ago when the Celtics put down the Bulls... again.  Showing a complete lack of class, the Bulls mascot "Benny The Bull" (during a timeout) used one of those t-shirt guns (one of the things that killed Mrs. Flanders on the Simpsons) and fired a couple shirts into the backs of both James Posey and Kevin Garnett.  You can read the whole story here.

Anyway, the Bulls organization are now changing the facts.  In true Revisionist form, the Bulls are now saying that their mascot didn't fire the shots at all.  That, well, I'll let them explain it...

“When the IncrediBull member tripped, the shirts were accidentally launched in the direction of the Celtics, but they did hit the floor first according to what we saw. When it took place we did take steps to apologize to the Celtics’ bench and the referees during the timeout and let them know what happened during that same timeout," said Bulls spokesman Tim Hallam.

 In the words of Conan O'Brien, "You can't make this stuff up... and why would you want to?"

Lastly, congratulations to the Celtics on a 60-win season!!!  Now the only number that matters is 17.  Let's make it happen!